So annoyed

I have to say, I think I’ve been pretty lucky so far.

I’ve heard so many stories about strangers coming up to mothers and criticising them, or providing unsolicited advice. Every time I read about this happening, I think to myself, “Oh, if someone did that to me, I’d tell them where to go…”

So, yesterday, I took Pumpkin out to the shops for a change of scenery, as I’d been working at home all day (or at least trying to).

Now, the shops are directly below our flat. I go out the front door and not even 20 seconds later, I’m in a shop.

Convenient, right? It also means that, even in really cold weather, I don’t need to worry about bundling the kid up in all sorts of layers. The cosytoes on her new pram is nice and warm and I pop a hat on her if she’s not wearing something with a hood. Literally, we’re outside for seconds. She’s not going to freeze – and actually, a few days earlier, she had her coat on when we went shopping and she started to overheat.

Baby cosy in pram

This is most definitely not a cold baby.

 

We were in a clothing store, attempting to stock up on pyjamas (her feet are going to burst through her current collection of onesies soon), when a woman – a complete stranger – walked up to us, bent down, TOUCHED my baby’s face and said to her: “Your mama needs to dress you more warmly.”

I was livid.

But what did I do? I went in to defence mode.

Instead of telling her to eff off. I started babbling on about how we live nearby.

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“Oh, we live just up-” I stopped myself when I realised what I was doing. It was too late, though. She’d gotten in her little jibe and was starting to walk away, with no interest in my response.

But then she stopped, turned around and started to speak again, directly to me this time. Maybe she’d realised what she had done and was about to turn around and apologise?

Nope.

SHE INVITED ME TO HER CHURCH.

I was, quite honestly, gobsmacked. Standing in the middle of the store with my mouth actually hanging open, fuming on the inside, but unable to say anything.

When I finally regained my senses, she was gone. And I was left standing there, completely annoyed.

But not annoyed at her.

Well, annoyed a lot at her. But even more annoyed at myself. Why did I go into defensive mode, rather than tell her where she could stick her unsolicited criticism? Not to mention, chewing her out for touching my child…

Maybe because I live on the outskirts of a big city and don’t want to get stabbed? I don’t think so. I mean, I don’t want to get stabbed – but I’ve also been much more assertive than that because somebody pushed me out of the way getting on the train.

I don’t know, but I have a feeling that if something similar happened again, I’d do the exact same thing. Let’s just hope it doesn’t. I have enough to be annoyed at myself about – I don’t need to add anything else to the list.


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8 Comments on "So annoyed"

  1. Ummmm…I think next time you will hit them with a convenient stuffed animal (or club). I have complete faith in your future response. 🙂

  2. I used to be just like that when my girls were smaller…..Now if anyone questions my parenting skills I always answer back…..hehehe
    Try not to let it worry you! You know what’s best for your child 🙂 x
    Kim Carberry recently posted…Ellie’s eBay Finds…..My Profile

  3. I know what you mean with unsolicited advice. I am usually the same and can’t think of anything to say at the time, I think it’s because you get put on the spot…I always think of loads of good responses afterwards though! Try not to let it get to you too much x
    Mummy’s Blog recently posted…Video calls with DaddyMy Profile

    • Thanks. Yeah, I think you’re right about feeling on the spot. It’s like how on quiz shows people suddenly can’t answer a basic question, even though you know they know the answer. Sure is annoying though. Work faster, brain!

  4. Why must the old ladies touch the children? It makes me so mad, especially if they add a critical comment. One told my son, who smiled at her quite bemused “Oh isn’t Mammy silly forgetting your hat”. We were indoors. And he had a hood. Grr! Great post.
    Lisa recently posted…I’m not a Bad MammyMy Profile

    • Oh, that would have really annoyed me too – maybe they think they’re being nicer if they make the critical comment while touching the child? I don’t know, but hands off my kid! Thanks for your comment. 🙂

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